I never quite know how to explain Brayden to people. Most of the time, children are easier to talk to about him than adults. Children's curiosity is, for the most part, innocent and genuine.
Most of the children in our community, school and church have been around Brayden enough to know that he is different. They do not treat him poorly and in fact many of them come talk to him or ask great questions...like this one from a little girl at church, "Can I get pushed around like him, it looks like fun?"
Recently, Carter and Luke had a friend over. This little boy seemed freaked out by Brayden. He would look at him from the corner of his eye. I usually tell the children that they can say hello to Brayden because he likes being around others. This little boy wanted nothing to do with talking to him.
I did not think much of it until. I saw him awkwardly cross the room and around a table, in what looked like a path to avoid coming to close to Brayden. Then as it came time for him to go, he needed to grab his coat and backpack...which was hanging on the chair next to Brayden. The little boy's eyes were big. He stood back as far as he could, stretched out his arm and reached for his things...staying as far from Brayden as possible.
I found myself just watching and not addressing the little boy's actions. I really did not know what to say or what to think about it.
3 comments:
It is very simple. You have to understand the point of view. As the father of Segev I have seen children who look so different because of their disabilities that it takes a second for my brain to adjust. I need a moment to process visually how a face that looks like a picasso painting, fits together. I can do this, but a child, with much smaller frame of reference, cannot. Children also shy away from sick grandparents, or sometimes just from someone who is very old. I think your son is beautiful, so don't misunderstand me but ask yourself, why do people stare at accidents?
That is a tough one! I have had all kinds of responses to Emily. Some kids ask really great questions. Some stare (I cannot tell you how many kids have walked into things because they have been staring at Emily instead of watching where they are going). Some are afraid. I think all of us have been afraid of things that we don't understand. Hopefully this boy will become more and more comfortable as he comes around. What a great opportunity for growth!
I think he was afraid. Not surprising, since to him it is the unknown. My sons brought their friends over as they were growing up and my daughter was little. Some were imediately comfortable and some just had to be around us for a little while, watch how we all interacted with her( i made a point of interacting with her) and soon they got the idea. It's a wonderful opportunity for learning, as another poster said!
Funny story... when my oldest son was in high school and my daughter was about 6, i noticed him bring various girls over to the house, and I asked him what was going on. He said that he needed to see if prospective girlfriends were 'comfortable' with Sarah so he would know which one to date. LOL.
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