Thursday, May 15, 2008

Great Expectations

Knowing that you are going to have a child is filled with wonderful anticipation and excitement. Filled with questions: What will they look like? Who will they look like, mommy or daddy? What baby items do we need? What color should we paint the room? Are we ready for a baby?

Filled with questions but do we stop and think about what our expectations will be? They will go to school. They will play sports. They will go to college, get married, have a family… But what about the small and simple expectations that we have for our little one? They will learn to sit up, then crawl and then walk. The first words will be “mama” or “dada”. We will have lot of play dates and trips to the park to run around.

What do we do if the possibilities of any of those things happening are taken away? Having Brayden made me realize that I am filled with expectations for my children; as each month passes and I try to let go of these expectations. At first realizing that I had all of these expectations that may never be met was devastating. I would leave the doctor offices with my stomach in knots. Expecting to hear good news but walking out with more questions and expectations that where slowly drifting away. What do you mean he is going to have extreme difficulty walking? We may never hear him speak any words?

Recently, I say this quote in an article about expectations.
“Unfulfilled expectations always cause problems. Having expectations in our culture is expected. We are brought up that way. Having great expectations sounds great however when the expectation is unfulfilled, we become disappointed.”

It is not to say we do not work towards him being able to sit up, talk or walk. Being in the moment and celebrating the small things that he does is the only way I have found to refrain from expectations. That way anything that happens is truly up to the Lord. Of course He can exceed any expectation we may have and probably not in the way we expected.

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