Understanding Gap

I was given a book shortly after Brayden was born about having a child with a disability. To be honest, I never picked it up until recently. There is a section in the book discussing the “understanding gap.” People that do not have a child with a disability have a hard time relating and understanding your situation. I have not really experienced much of this. Brayden is usually surrounded by family and friends who have been around from the beginning. If they do not understand something they ask or fake it really well! Yesterday, I experienced my first real understanding gap. I scheduled an appointment at a salon for a micro dermabrasion facial (I have never had one before). When I called to schedule, I mentioned that I would have a baby with me because he had special needs and where I go, he goes. I assured them that he would not be a distraction and does not make any noise. The salon seemed okay with it. I arrived yesterday morning and received a not so warm greeting. It all started with the owner giving me an earful about bringing him was disrespectful to the salon and others using it. People came to relax and not to hear a baby. I tried to explain that he was handicap and I need a special person to watch him (which we have not found yet). I tried to explain that even though he is one, he does not get up and move around or make any noise. He does not know how to do that. We proceeded to the treatment room. I am not clear as to how Brayden would be a distraction to other clients; we were in a private room that had air purifier going and some music. I don’t think people could hear anything if the other rooms were similar. The owner was the person doing my treatment. She huffed around trying to make the room accommodate the stroller. Once we got situated, I really wanted to grab Brayden and get out or start crying. I was so flustered; I did not know what to do so I sat up on the table. She helped me get situated. Several times during the treatment she asked if I was comfortable. I wanted to scream no! I just wanted the treatment to be over as fast as possible. I realize that she did not understand my circumstances but I was hoping that she would try. Brayden was quiet for the whole thing but of course he had a stinky diaper in the middle of the treatment. I tried to ignore it and hoped the woman did not smell it! At least my skin is smooth!