How many times a week do we say hello to people and ask "how are you?" Do we really want to know how they are doing or have the time? Do we just ask out of courtesy?
How am I? I would say, “We are doing okay. Busy morning for Brayden, got the other two off to school. They had a wonderful time at school while I was running some errands. And I am loving this weather and ready for fall.” I am pretty sure those words came out of my mouth several times today.
Inside my head I am really thinking. Today has been rough. I have cried a couple of times and been ready to cry several times. I woke to find Brayden had vomited…again. It was so acidic that it literally burned his skin, the backs of his arms from elbow to shoulder and half of his back. I tried to bathe him but the sting of soap and water caused him to scream in pain. I could not get him to calm down. I finally took him out of the bath, wrapped him in a towel, sat on the floor and held him for about 20 minutes. Meanwhile Carter and Luke are not dressed for school and we should have already left the house. Luke is upset about being late. I am on the phone with the doctor and still trying to calm Brayden. His skin was bleeding and burning. The doctor called in a prescription for burn cream (thus my errand running). I decided to just leave the house with breakfast plates on the table, Brayden dirty sheets on the bed (I am still washing them everyday because of vomiting), pajamas on the floor and probably a dirty diaper next to them. If you know me, I like to have the house clean and tidy before I leave so walking out the door with the mess was hard. We finally made it to school. I was not sure that I even brushed my teeth. That was the first two hours of my day.
How am I? Grouchy and frustrated. Aren’t you glad you asked?
7 comments:
Oh what a crummy way to start the day! I do hope it got a liitle better as the day moved on. I know when I have bad days, I just really want to shut down, Take a hot bath, read a book, and sip a glass of wine. But as a mom, it doesn't happen often. I know that tomorrow will be better for you, and know you and Brayden are in my prayers this evening
Carrie, I want to fix everything for you and don't know how. I didn't do a good job of it in Leesburg and I'm currently half way around the world, but I want to find a way to help you! Any thoughts? Does Papa John's or Pizza Hut deliver to your house? Can I order delivery for you guys one night so you don't have to cook? Let me know...or any other thoughts. Want to send Luke and Carter to Bangkok for a while? :) Praying for you and wanting to do more!!!
Oh, Carrie - I wish we lived closer. I'm sorry that we tend to go through life giving the quick, cheerful answers instead of the honest ones...I do the same. When people ask our friend, Matt, "What's up?" He answers, "Everything." When you ask him what's wrong, he'll say sometimes that it's nothing major but that there is always something going on so if he answers "Nothing" than that is further from the truth.
thanks for sharing how you're REALLY doing.
Dear Carrie,
I'm so sorry for the awful start to your day. I have realized that we walk around every day with people not even realizing the pain, grief, and difficult things we have to live with - and in turn, what others are dealing with; especially when it looks like it's just altogether. May I share some verses that have helped me as we have journeyed with Toby. Psalm 40:1-3 ""I waited patiently for the LORD; And he inclined to me, And heard my cry. He also brought me up out of a horrible pit, Out of miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my steps. He has put a new song in my mouth..Praise to our God; many will see it and fear, and will trust in the LORD."
Don't forget to take things one day, sometimes even one minute at a time!! I'm praying for you.
Hoping that both Brayden and mommy are feeling better
Why oh why didn't I read this before I saw you in Target? I need to check in with you daily...
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